We always hear the catchy phrase you are what you think, but is this true? Recent reading of neuroscience and psychology books taught me that our brain is not trustworthy, because thinking can be unreliable due to its automatic (thus uncontrollable) mechanism. We are easily derailed by cognitive bias, and allow our contrived stories/thoughts to create negative experiences. In this post, we will see how our brain’s wirings can trip us, and how mindfulness can mitigate. I’m also going to share my experiences using these mindful tips in emotional uphavels to regain clarity.
Why are our thoughts not trustworthy?
the brain just wants to survive
Despite the relative small size of our brain, it uses up over 20% of our body energy. To allow us to survive and perform critical functions, our brain is wired to conserve energy so that we can execute better and avoid being killed. In fact, a neuroscientist even claims that our brain is not wired to think but to survive.
the brain is a prediction machine
The brain is a Bayesian machine trying to reduce uncertainty. Like what Anil Seth explained in this TED talk, We don’t just passively perceive the world, we actively generate it. The world we experience comes as much, if not more, from the inside out as from the outside in…..We predict ourselves into existence.
The brain is always scanning around, making connections using our existing neural paths to make meaning out of the observed objects. It then matches them with previous experiences, and calculates probabilities of such events for happening again. The highest probable event will be projected as a likely outcome. The brain will then mobilize the whole body to prepare for it to happen, producing various sensations such as tightness in the chest, raising heartrate, etc. It’s only until then that we become aware. We might think something is proven fact whereas in fact it has just been calculated by our mind unconsciously.
the brain is a storyteller
Events are neutral. It is how our brain makes out of it and weave it into stories that invoke our emotions.
Human beings are wired to find meaning (the why) behind facts (concepts) in everything. In the process, we try to glue existing data using our existing opinions and assumptions, to produce a cohesive (in the terms of computer scientist Judea Pearl, causal) story to explain things. Pearl stated that such glued causal relationships (not facts) made up most of our knowledges, but we have forgotten their roots.
We then unconsciously act on such stories (self-fulfilled prophecy).
Worse yet, we fail to see many hidden factors in this intertwined web that we reside in, so we boldly assume that x -> y , whereas it is more likely x + something else -> y. What we see as causal might not be so simple.
an analogy to data analysis
When the brain is trying to collect and glue datapoints together, it is sometimes doing a very patchy job because
- the datapoints (facts we observe) are few and our brain is attempting to underfit as is in linear regression. Underfitting occurs when the model has not trained for enough time or the input variables are not significant enough to determine a meaningful relationship between the input and output variables. In both scenarios, the model cannot establish the dominant trend within the training dataset.
- we can only draw references from our limited brain library either from our personal experiences or what we learnt from others. If our library is small, we might have weak glues.
- we already had a bias when we gathered data. In other words, the datapoints might not be comprehensive enough to begin with, but just represent a subset of the real world. It reflects our bias when we just look at data we like to include, and exclude those we find conflicting to our existing view. Worst yet, we will then attempt to glue them into the way we want the outcome to be.
the brain wants to be correct
If what is predicted matches the real experience, dopamine is produced and the brain feels a sense of accomplishment, and we are happy. If however, the prediction turns out to be wrong, the brain will need to update our mental models with new information. Updating our cognitive database is both energy and time consuming, and the brain might try to conserve our energy by avoiding such cognitive dissonance. We then fall into the trap of inertia, that we by avoiding prediction errors, we maintain the status quo even though it might be against our long term interest.
the brain is a cache
The brain will cache peak experiences for retrieval when something similar comes up, so you don’t need to expend energy to experience it again. However, since humans are loss aversive, meaning that most of what we deem the most intense emotions are often negative, the cache is filled with negative peak experiences. This automatically creates a negative bias when we view things. The book Deeper Mindfulness recalls one patient suffering from chronic pain, who is always recalling the most painful episode regardless of her current pain intensity.
emotions are constructed
Lisa Barrett has pioneered the research on how emotions work. She argues that emotions are constructed from our past experiences and cultural context, to explain a body sensation or a perceived external stimulant. Our physical sensation comes first, then a feeling (pleasant, unpleasant, neutral) is assigned to it. Only then will our prefrontal cortex be involved to explain the feeling with a meaning or story, hence comes our thoughts. Our emotion (e.g., I feel sad because it’s a rainy day) is a complex package resulting from such production sequence.
In one experiment, test subjects with artificially boosted heartrate perceive a neutral portrait having a fearful or threatening stance. And Barrett’s own experience in a blind date got her associated flu-like symptom with infatuation.
why is it bad?
In the book Deeper Mindfulness, Professor Williams sums it up by saying that we live in a simulation only, as what we are experiencing is just a pre-processed simulation by our brain, using cached experience and prediction to speed up our perception. It is definitely not deriving from as much real data as we assume! We feel an event is going to happen because our body is prepping for it. Then the brain looks at our body sensations and confirms that the event is indeed unfolding. It updates and reinforces our existing mental models, so the next time we experience something similar, our view becomes even more biased. If the projected event is a negative thing, this can easily spin up a downward spiral. We are not really living in each moment but are bound to our past.
I think we can compare and contrast the digestive system with the brain. The digestive system is automatic and well machined to absorb nutrients and remove toxins from the body. The brain, with human intervention, can be swayed to absorb toxic content while letting nutrients pass. Our mind is not seeing reality as-is and rather delusional at times by design to conserve energy and improve survival with quick prediction instead of actual observation.
How can mindfulness help?
Numerous medical professionals have written about the benefits of practicing mindfulness for health benefits. Professor Mark Williams from Oxford University, the cofounder of Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy. MbCT, has written several books with detailed practice-at-home programs to help us become more aware of our feelings and thoughts.
In his latest book, he outlined a program for us to observe the feeling tone, the very rapid arising feeling of pleasant, unpleasant and neutral and be more in control with what happens next. The 8-week program in the book is an adaptation of MbCT, which has been deployed worldwide to treat depression and anxiety patient who are not responding to traditional medical treatments.
what it is not
Many people associate mindfulness with sitting meditation and automatically assign a religious flavor to it. In fact, meditation is not religious and is only one form of being mindful. We can practice mindfulness almost everywhere while doing anything, be it walking, drinking, eating or just breathing. Being mindful is not about having an empty mind, nor experiencing bliss. Both are extreme ends of the spectrum. In fact, many people who are distressed chase such goals and get double suffering when they cannot achieve that, driving them into a downward spiral.
what it is
Being mindful is simply an invitation to look inward, to bring awareness to your body sensations, feelings and thoughts in each moment, without judgment or assigning values. It allows you to be comfortable with whatever you experience here, and now. It is not to artificially and happily embracing your experience and “drinking cool aid”, convincing yourself that they are your true self, they are here to help you, or are the best thing happening to you, etc. With a neutral stance, you do not need to react to anything. You can pause to process your inputs and select a thoughtful and intentional response to move forward.
When I was very sick this year living with pain and discomfort, I didn’t make myself feel better by claiming my illness was the best or my teachers/friends and glorifying the suffering, but I just accepted them when they came, not tracing their source, or projecting if they will stay. I just noticed “oh, I feel pain in this area of my body”. Just accept this moment I have pain and that’s it. Don’t assign too much value and meaning to them. When I distanced myself with it and just watched, they became much more tolerable.
Glorifying a suffering might backfire and push you into double suffering, you suffer the pain and also beat yourself up for not being “positive enough” like others.
So our goal is not to glorify, elevate, deny or nullify anything. We are meeting it heads on with honesty. State it as a fact with a name, nothing more or less. We can take a scientific approach by boxing it as in a lab setting, viewing it as an experiment specimen. Do not forward or back-link anything by assigning causal relationship. Isolate it, and if you are curious, study it. If not, just BE. Not DO.
to savor the only reality: now
When we turn inward to be with ourselves in where we are now, we experience the reality fully, without previous luggage or future projection. As the neuroscientist and psychiatrist Arash Javanbakht wrote in Afraid, the only real moment in our life is right now. A second before and a second after now are both just the result of neural memory and imagination.
to refresh cache
As the brain saves us energy by loading from cache, what we are experiencing now is a cached experience from the past. As Professor Williams says, so much of life is a reaction to what happened in the previous moment. To increase awareness, we can deliberately refresh the cache so we experience things like the first time.
I often use this technique to counter my automatic thoughts. Sometimes when I talk about past unpleasant events, I notice I am reliving the whole event with the same tight body sensation and negative feelings. But I have gained new perspectives of the event and don’t have the same negative feelings towards it anymore. I will then pause and ask myself, if the current feeling is just old data loaded from my cache, or is it reflecting my current world view. Often I find that it is from the former, after much contemplation. By allowing myself to consciously look at it with my new lens, I have discarded the cached data and updated it with new and helpful information. I also respect the current moment more, by acknowledging my sentiments towards the past event do have ups and downs, and not necessarily default to the peak negative sentiment from the past.
to buy more time and space to process data
If emotions are constructed, then the pause we offer to our brain after experiencing a stimulant can alter the construction.
When I pause after an emotion arises, not only will I question if it is loaded from cache, but if the feeling tone is very unpleasant, I will try to alter what I am doing to change the body sensation. For example, when I feel anxiety (or in Lisa Barrett’s words, “high arousal of unpleasantness”), I often notice that I am crouching on the sofa with a tight chest. A few minutes in treadmill (change of body posture) flushes out the tightness sensation and a new, fresh, expanded body sensation comes in. I gradually notice that I have a mildly pleasant feeling, and then an emotion of feeling healthy and a positive outlook of the future gradually fills in. Of course regular exercises can help to improve brain chemistry in various positive ways , but my example shows that just a quick switch of behaviors to change body sensation can pull you out of the imminent dip.
to construct a baseline
By becoming more aware of both our body sensations and what flows in our mind, it’s like consciously collecting live data to establish a baseline of what an average day looks like. When we get overwhelmed, such practice can help us notice any deviation and alert us to be extra cautious in scrutinizing the current situation. We become our own driver, instead of being held hostage by our elevated emotions or mis-predicted thoughts that are outside of our normal ranges. This is similar to fraud detection systems used to detect anomaly in financial industry.
A simple exercise to constructing a baseline is through journaling. You can take notes of when and what specific stimulant triggers particular reactions, and also your feelings and surroundings when everything is calm. After a few weeks, you will be able to get some consistent patterns.
to reconstruct/recreate new experiences
If emotions are constructed automatically from our past experience, we can retake control to learn something new that serves as seeds for our prediction machine, so that we can create fresh experience in the future.
We also need to be aware of our language, as the words choices can shape our stories.
This approach is similar to the ABC model used in Cognitive Behavior Therapy, that by changing your belief, you have more control of the consequence. Just an event alone won’t trigger a result. It is what we encounter, plus our belief that makes us do something. In other words, our belief determines our outcome.
Knowing this gives us reassurance that we can change our future experiences, and our destiny.
to have an experimental mindset
If our expectation doesn’t match the reality, instead of feeling disappointed (or worse yet, trying to prove we’re right), perhaps we can use an experimental mindset. We can view everything we do as mini-experiments, and the world as a lab. We iterate through each action by doing it in small steps and checking for feedback before determining the next step. This way, prediction errors are purely data that assist us in learning and pivoting. As indicated in the book Trustworthy Online Controlled Experiments Interesting experiments are ones where the absolute difference between the expected outcome and the actual result is large. If you thought something was going to happen and it happened, then you haven’t learned much. If you thought something was going to happen and it didn’t, then you’ve learned something important. And if you thought something minor was going to happen, and the results are a major surprise and lead to a breakthrough, you’ve learned something highly valuable.
Conclusion
There are many online resources on practicing mindfulness. Among them, the Oxford Mindfulness Foundation has some easy starter kits to start your journey. What matters is not a one-shot attempt to pursue clarity of the mind, but view it as an everyday practice that can be incorporated seamlessly into our daily life. To be a bit more conscious of the glass of water we drink, to notice how fresh air passes our nose into our body during a walk in the park, to view a rising sentiment as an ocean wave we observe from a vista, all these are mini practices of mindfulness.
Even though we might never know the absolute truth, by distancing ourselves from automatic prediction and cache loading, we can refrain from knee-jerk reactions. We gain more time to collect quality information from a broader scope (e.g., 3rd party evidence, perspectives from different cultures and eras), so that we do not jump to causal conclusions easily. In this way, we have a higher chance of approaching truth.